pozmagazine:

Check Out POZ Mag’s Continuing Coverage of #AIDS2014
We’re working hard in both Melbourne and NYC to help bring you all the latest research, advocacy, policy and news from the 20th International AIDS Conference.

pozmagazine:

Check Out POZ Mag’s Continuing Coverage of #AIDS2014

We’re working hard in both Melbourne and NYC to help bring you all the latest research, advocacy, policy and news from the 20th International AIDS Conference.

Time for another ask an expert blog!!
Question:  How do I tell my partner if I am unhappy?
“Answer:  Being able to communicate well with your partner is very important. If you are able to express your thoughts, feelings, and needs to your partner, you will feel better about yourself and are more likely to have a satisfying relationship.
First of all, it helps to know that every relationship has its tough spots, and even couples that seem perfect to an outsider may have underlying issues. What makes a relationship healthy is being able to work through those issues in a way that is respectful to the feelings of both partners.
When something doesn’t feel right or isn’t going well, it can be tough to bring it up. Start by finding a time and space when you two can be alone without interruptions. If it feels natural, you might want to ease into the conversation by starting with something positive, such as something you like about your partner. But don’t wait too long to bring up what is on your mind.
Be direct and focus on your perspective and how you feel. Let’s say you want to spend more time with your partner, but he always seems to be busy with his friends. Instead of saying, “You’re so rude. You never invite me out,” say, “I feel left out when you don’t invite me out with your friends.” Or to start with something positive, say, “I like it when you text me when you are out, but when you don’t invite me out with you, I sometimes feel left out.”
Discussing things in this way can help you avoid some common mistakes like put-downs or attacking your partner’s character. Put-downs are things like name calling and insults. Attacking your partner’s character is generalizing blame (“You never…”, “You always…”), instead of talking about something specific. If you find yourself or your partner using put downs or getting caught up in anger, it’s best to pause, take a time out, and finish talking when you have calmed down.
Give your partner a chance to talk about her perspective. Part of being a good communicator is being an active listener. In other words, don’t just hear what your partner says, but you try to understand what she is saying.
If you try to work through a problem with your partner, and you just can’t, that isn’t necessarily bad. It could mean that the two of you aren’t right for each other or that this is not the right time for you to be together. If your partner verbally puts you down, tries to manipulate you, forces you do anything sexually that you don’t want to, or physically hurts you in any way, these are all forms of abuse. In these cases, sometimes the healthiest decision is to end the relationship.
Whatever it is that is on your mind, your partner won’t know unless you tell her. Having tough conversations in relationships takes practice, but it gets easier over time.
Additional resources:How Can We Communicate Better?Myths about Intimate Partner Violence in the LGBTQIA Community”
In our “Ask an Expert” blog series, researchers from the IMPACT Program answer questions from LGBTQ youth. This month’s expert is Dr. Brian Mustanski, director of the IMPACT Program and a licensed clinical psychologist.
Featured image credit: By Kurt Löwenstein Educational Center International Team from Germany (IMG_26671) [CC-BY-2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons.

Time for another ask an expert blog!!

Question:  How do I tell my partner if I am unhappy?

Answer:  Being able to communicate well with your partner is very important. If you are able to express your thoughts, feelings, and needs to your partner, you will feel better about yourself and are more likely to have a satisfying relationship.

First of all, it helps to know that every relationship has its tough spots, and even couples that seem perfect to an outsider may have underlying issues. What makes a relationship healthy is being able to work through those issues in a way that is respectful to the feelings of both partners.

When something doesn’t feel right or isn’t going well, it can be tough to bring it up. Start by finding a time and space when you two can be alone without interruptions. If it feels natural, you might want to ease into the conversation by starting with something positive, such as something you like about your partner. But don’t wait too long to bring up what is on your mind.

Be direct and focus on your perspective and how you feel. Let’s say you want to spend more time with your partner, but he always seems to be busy with his friends. Instead of saying, “You’re so rude. You never invite me out,” say, “I feel left out when you don’t invite me out with your friends.” Or to start with something positive, say, “I like it when you text me when you are out, but when you don’t invite me out with you, I sometimes feel left out.”

Discussing things in this way can help you avoid some common mistakes like put-downs or attacking your partner’s character. Put-downs are things like name calling and insults. Attacking your partner’s character is generalizing blame (“You never…”, “You always…”), instead of talking about something specific. If you find yourself or your partner using put downs or getting caught up in anger, it’s best to pause, take a time out, and finish talking when you have calmed down.

Give your partner a chance to talk about her perspective. Part of being a good communicator is being an active listener. In other words, don’t just hear what your partner says, but you try to understand what she is saying.

If you try to work through a problem with your partner, and you just can’t, that isn’t necessarily bad. It could mean that the two of you aren’t right for each other or that this is not the right time for you to be together. If your partner verbally puts you down, tries to manipulate you, forces you do anything sexually that you don’t want to, or physically hurts you in any way, these are all forms of abuse. In these cases, sometimes the healthiest decision is to end the relationship.

Whatever it is that is on your mind, your partner won’t know unless you tell her. Having tough conversations in relationships takes practice, but it gets easier over time.

Additional resources:
How Can We Communicate Better?
Myths about Intimate Partner Violence in the LGBTQIA Community

In our “Ask an Expert” blog series, researchers from the IMPACT Program answer questions from LGBTQ youth. This month’s expert is Dr. Brian Mustanski, director of the IMPACT Program and a licensed clinical psychologist.

Featured image credit: By Kurt Löwenstein Educational Center International Team from Germany (IMG_26671) [CC-BY-2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons.

pozmagazine:

Media Bungles Another HIV Story
In a rash of inaccurate and hyperbolic reporting, numerous press outlets (from the Atlantic to Joe. My. God.’s blog) misreported over the weekend that WHO wants all gay men to take PrEP.
It’s really just a recommendation. Here are the facts on the announcement.

Thanks for clarifying!

pozmagazine:

Media Bungles Another HIV Story

In a rash of inaccurate and hyperbolic reporting, numerous press outlets (from the Atlantic to Joe. My. God.’s blog) misreported over the weekend that WHO wants all gay men to take PrEP.

It’s really just a recommendation. Here are the facts on the announcement.

Thanks for clarifying!

Going to a clinic for various health services can be worrisome since it is not clear what your rights are and/or what level of privacy is included.  Check out this blog to learn more!!

How do I know if my parent(s) or guardian will find out?

Many states have exceptions to parental consent or notification laws for sexual health services like and abortion or HIV testing. For example, in California, if you are 12-years-old or older, testing and treatment for STIs and HIV are confidential.

However, in Illinois, if you are 12-years-old or older, testing and treatment for STIs and HIV do not require parental consent, but your doctor may legally discuss this with your parents.  This doesn’t mean that they will. If you are unsure, you should ask at the clinic or doctor’s office, because you have a right to know.

What are the laws in my state?

It’s important to look at the laws in your state, and we recommend Sex Etc.’s Sex in the States. This state-by-state map explains what your rights are on eleven topics, including LGBTQ rights, condoms, and even sexual health education! It will also tell you what age you have to be for each law to apply. Guttmacher Institute is another great resource that has overviews of state policies related to teen health.

Is oral sex safer sex?

The answer might be more complicated than you think. Our newest video talks about the benefits and risks of oral sex, including what you need to know to protect yourself and your partners - including how to use a dental dam!

What’s it like to get an HIV test??

Regular HIV testing is an important way to protect your health and the health of your sexual partners.  But how do you get an HIV test and what’s it like?  This video shows how to get an HIV test at Center on Halsted in Chicago.  The testing experience is similar in clinics across the country.  To find out more about testing atCenter on Halsted call 773-661-0910 or visit centeronhalsted.org/HIV.html.  If you call the State of Illinois AIDS/HIV & STD Hotline at 1-800-AID-AIDS (1-800-243-2437), staff can also help you find other HIV testing and STD testing and treatment locations in Illinois that are near you. If you are outside of Illinois you can usean app to find a testing location near you.

This video was created by the IMPACT LGBT Health and Development Program at Northwestern University in partnership with Center on Halsted.

(Source: vimeo.com)

pozmagazine:

New CDC Study: Bisexual Men Have Higher STI Rates Than GaysMSMW are also less likely to use condoms or get tested. Experts say the social stigma toward bisexuals often contribute to the groups’ higher HIV and STI rates.  In the U.S., bisexuals make up an estimated 2 percent of the sexually active males in the United States.

pozmagazine:

New CDC Study: Bisexual Men Have Higher STI Rates Than Gays

MSMW are also less likely to use condoms or get tested. Experts say the social stigma toward bisexuals often contribute to the groups’ higher HIV and STI rates.  In the U.S., bisexuals make up an estimated 2 percent of the sexually active males in the United States.

(via safecampaign)

We are an LGBTQ Health & Development Research Group @ Northwestern University in Chicago, IL.  Our work focuses on improving the health of the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender community, with a particular focus on adolescents and young adults.
www.impactprogram.org - visit our site for more LGBTQ youth sex & health development info!

We are an LGBTQ Health & Development Research Group @ Northwestern University in Chicago, IL.  Our work focuses on improving the health of the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender community, with a particular focus on adolescents and young adults.

www.impactprogram.org - visit our site for more LGBTQ youth sex & health development info!